Three in May

To my sweet baby,

I have wanted to write your birth story since we brought you have from the hospital. Life happened and I'm finally getting around to it.

We had moved to Littleton. Your dad had just gotten a job at MillerCoors, which meant we had wonderful insurance. Naturally we wanted to have a baby. 

I had taken a friend to see the Royal Gorge Bridge on a slightly windy day but the motion of the bridge was making me feel much more queasy than it should have. I typically have a pretty strong stomach for motion. Over the course the next few days I started to feel an extremely sharp pain that sent me to the bathroom. On multiple occasions I would be huddled in a ball due to the pain. In the mean time I had a new patient exam to find a doctor now that we were in Littleton. I mentioned the pain, he jokingly said that I did not have listeria (there was an outbreak in cantaloupe at the time). He even joked about me being pregnant. He then said I most likely had ovarian cysts and gave me a very strong pain reliever. It didn't help. 

After a particularly long evening of pain I got myself up and to the store and to purchase a pregnancy test. I just had a feeling. It was positive. I dug through the trash to find the one I had taken the night before, the one that was negative. It now read positive too. I quickly got the display that I had in my mind ready for your dad. 

I wanted to make him breakfast but the oven was "broken."

When he opened it there was a "bun in the oven." 

We were overjoyed and a bit shocked since it really had not taken long for us to get pregnant. I continued to experience extreme pain. We weren't scheduled to see an OBGYN for a few weeks. When I explained over the phone my pain I was instructed to go to the hospital. They drew blood and performed an ultrasound. I had one a few days earlier that didn't show a cyst, or a baby. This time it showed what could have been a baby. However, they told us that the hormone numbers were not increasing like they should have been for a successful pregnancy. 

We left the hospital with the idea of knowing that there was a chance that this baby would not make it. The pain subsided before my first appointment with my OBGYN. Tim was working so I had to go by myself. When the doctor came in to talk with me after the ultrasound I must have had quite a look on my face. The doctor asked me if I was ok. I wanted this baby, I spent nights praying endlessly for this baby and now here we are, is this baby going to be in my arms in a nine months ... or not? She asked again if I was ok and if we wanted this baby? WHAT? Of course I want this baby. After she learned that my shock, scare and fear was because I had been previously told that this baby might not make it she informed me that everything was looking good. You, our sweet baby were growing right on track. 

 8 week ultrasound

After our first initial scare, which we still aren't sure the cause of, the pregnancy went quite well. I never got sick. However, I had to eat non-stop to not feel sick for about three months. Bread and canned peaches were my go to! 

 16 weeks

 20 weeks

 22 weeks

 26 weeks

 31 weeks

38 weeks

We went in for a weekly appointment when I was 39 weeks pregnant and were asked when I wanted to be done being pregnant. I was not ready for this question. I agreed to being induced on May 26th, the day before our due date. I didn't want to be induced. We went to bed on the 25th and could hardly sleep. I got up super early to shower and while I showered I missed a call. The ward was busy and they could not take us. I was relieved. Your dad was upset that I agreed to do an induction if that wasn't what I wanted. He liked the idea of knowing when you would come, I can't blame him, waiting was hard. I was upset, I was crying and went up to the gym at our apartment and walked on the treadmill until I couldn't take it any more. I got home and bounced on my ball for what felt like hours. That night I went to bed and when I woke up it was early and I had contractions that were pretty close together. I laid in bed and kept track of them, they were getting closer together and not stopping. I got up and took a shower and got myself ready while I let your dad sleep. I finally called the doctor when the contractions were about 5 minutes apart. When she found out that I had been told I was dilated four centimeters a few days earlier she told me that I needed to get to the hospital, now. I woke up your dad and we got ready to go meet you.

When we got to the hospital I changed into my hospital gown. They checked me as well as monitored me for a little bit. It looked like we were most likely going to be sent home. I requested an exercise ball to sit on, while we waited to see if we would be discharged or not. I had read every single pregnancy book the library had, I was going to do this thing right! Unfortunately I was not giving very good signals while on the ball and was forced to lay on the bed. I knew this was not the position to be in to help labor progress. At one point while on the phone with my mom, your Nana, and I had rolled onto my right side to get comfortable. The nurse came running in and informed me I needed to lay on my back.

You, our sweet baby, weren't responding to contractions. Not only were you not responding, but your heart rate dropped and did not come back up. Knowing what I know now I am so thankful you were my first pregnancy. Had we known that what I was experiencing were most likely Braxton Hicks contractions, we would have probably stayed home. Furthermore, in the days leading up to your birthday I had thought you were simply running out of room and that was why you weren't moving around as often as you once had been. At some point in this time frame I had told Nana and Papa they should probably get in the car and head to the hospital. Little did I know we would have you before they got there. We were going to be taken back for an emergency C-Section. Once that decision was made we were whisked back to the operating room before I could even call your Nana again, I had wanted another chance to tell her I loved her, but I didn't get one.

We entered the operating room at 12:34 in the afternoon. I was sitting up to be given my spinal block when I had a contraction come on. The anesthesiologist said I seemed tense, I informed her I was having a contraction. My original birth plan was to have you without an epidural, a needle in the back was not what I wanted. Since I had no choice I certainly was not going to move even a fraction of an inch while it was being inserted! I focused on your daddy in front of me, I was so glad he was there.

With your dad by my side the doctors and nurses all introduced themselves to me as they quickly ran about the room. I asked if I was exposed from the waste down at the time (the curtain was already up so I could not see), I was. Wonderful, I really had to laugh off the fact that I was meeting people while they were seeing all of me.

We were asked one last time what we thought your gender was. We both answered, "A boy." Then just as quickly as we had entered the operating room there you were! Your dad looked at you first and then looked at me and excitedly announced, "It's a ... a girl!" I think my exact words were, "Really?!" It was all I could get out because I was in such shock of the whole situation. You took a few minutes, or so it seemed, to let out a cry. Once you did I was able to feel some relief. I could see you to my right while they were checking your vitals. I could see your feet and counted all ten toes (a silly thing to do since they were all accounted for during your anatomy ultrasound). Again, more relief. Then your dad brought you over to me and I was able to hold you, my baby, for the first time.

Karoline Christelle Reed, 7lbs 10oz 20.75 inches, born at 1p.m. on May 27, 2012.

I remember everything about this moment, and I tear up just looking at this picture. 

The doctor finished up everything with me while your dad watched over you, sweet girl. Then we all were rolled to the recovery room, together. When I got to hold you again I said, "Hi Karoline Christelle." The name we had picked out for you, it fit and was perfect. 

While in the recovery room I realized that I hadn't called my brother, your Uncle Scottie, or texted him. He was the only one that didn't know we were headed to the hospital to have you! Of course Nana and Papa told him but I was not coherent enough to think of that. I'm not sure how but I ended up with my phone and called him (those spinal tap drugs sure do mess with you a bit). He was the first person to find out that you were a GIRL and that your name was Karoline Christelle. Right at that time your grandparents walked into the recovery room and over heard. That's how they found out. Not exactly how I had it planned out in my mind, but perfect none the less. 

The following days in the hospital were a blur. We had visitors. I attempted to learn how to feed you. You had your first bath. You slept in your dads arms the entire first night and on my chest the second. We went home after two days. That night your dad went and got Subway for me and a Domino's Pizza for himself. I remember you sat on your bouncer chair on the ground in front of us while we ate dinner. We were now parents to the most beautiful little girl.

 You were so calm during your first bath.

I love the look on your dad's face.

A few days later we were told that my placenta had "expired" and you weren't getting the oxygen you needed. Thank the Lord that we went to the hospital when we did. We are forever grateful that you came into this world a beautiful and healthy baby girl.

So many memories and so much fun with you our sweet girl.

 We had your first birthday party at the zoo!

 Your daddy sure is a a handsome daddy... 

You became a big sister...

You turned two ...

We had a ladybug themed birthday party for you in Canon City. 

Everyone told me not to, but I blinked and you are three, THREE. I can't even begin to understand where the time has gone. Leading up to your third birthday people would ask, "How old are you going to be?" You would put your tiny precious thumb and pointer finger together and make the "OK" sign and hold up your three little fingers and reply, "Three in May." You are an amazing young lady with such a fun personality. You are one of my most favorite people to spend time with. When I wake up in the morning and hear that you are awake I am grateful that I get to spend another day with you. Another day to try and be the mama you need. I don't always get it right, sometimes (more often than I should) I get it wrong. We are learning together my dear sweet first born. My goal has been and always will be to be the mom that you need me to be.

 We had a Mickey Mouse ice cream birthday party for your third birthday. 

We had a little photoshoot on your third birthday ...

You amaze your father and I. Our lives are better because of you, we love you!

Love,
Your Mom

June Specials

Essential oils have become apart of our daily routine.

We wake up, Grapefruit or Lemon in our water.
NingXia Red after water.

Diffuse something summery smelling since the sun is refusing to shine in Colorado.
Use a cleaner made with Thieves on the counters and floors.
Stress Away on the back of my neck because I'm cleaning up after girls (and husband) non stop.

Peppermint on tummies that are feeling a bit queasy.

Thieves on the bottom of the girls' feet before leaving the house to keep germs away.

Lavender in the bath tub.
SleepyIze on the girls' feet before bed.
Diffuse Lavender while they sleep.

PanAway and a Lavender/coconut oil mixture on Tim's feet (he works 12 hour days on concrete). This addition to his evening helps him fall asleep fast and have fresh feet for the next day (it's also a nice ten minutes for just us).

Purification on my face, thank you red spots.
Frankincense and Lemon in my lotion for my face and neck.
Thieves and Lemon "tea" to help ease a sore throat.
Lavender on my jaw to help with clenching my teeth.

There are several work from home businesses that are using Facebook to acquire business and team members. I myself sell Pampered Chef and I'm fairly certain there is no way I would still be a consultant if it were not for social media.

But for me, Young Living Essential Oils are different. They are a way to change your day and life for the better. A way to have a day without chemicals. Would I like to make a profit, sure, who wouldn't? My goal is to pay for the oils that we are using as a family with the checks that I receive from Young Living. My hope is for each and every one of my family members and friends to have the ability to try essential oils. To turn to oils instead of the medicine cabinet that is full of chemicals and dyes.

For the month of June I would like to make it easier for my followers to purchase a starter kit. The Premium Starter Kit starts at $150 but there is the added expense of tax and shipping. If you are one of the first two purchasers this month I will reimburse you for your tax and shipping costs. Or you may choose to receive a FREE bottle of R.C. oil.

If you are in need of more information about Essential Oils please visit my Young Living Essential Oils page. As always, please feel free to contact me with any questions you may have.

What's in a name?

What's in a name? For an A-type blogger, apparently a lot. A few days back I purchased my own domain name for my blog. So long, ".blogspot," and good riddance. It was quite liberating to have a domain name and now a much more professional looking blog. My domain cost me $12. The updates to my page have all been free and completed with some helpful hints from a friend and Pinterest.

If I'm being completely honest there are days that I find myself jealous of those who have, "more." There were times that I was tempted to purchase a template for my page. However, when I sit back and look at how I am able to accomplish things with little to no money it makes me thankful for my clearance rack personality, thanks mom and Auntie Liz! I would like to think that this is also appreciated by my husband. By being aware and sparing when I spend money on extras it is a small way to show him I appreciate how hard he works for our family.

So, here it is, the not so grand reveal of my new website/blog. The pages are updated and I hope to add more pages soon. Enjoy!

Pictures always make a post better. Even if it's a little blurry and the small child is less than thrilled (she's been a real pistol since turning one folks). Even grumpy and angry looking she is still adorable! 

Cleaning Day

I love to have things clean. Not to be mistaken with the statement, "I love to clean." The two are different, very different. My cleaning day was planned. We were going to have an outing, laundry would be done, the house would be clean and dinner would be ready when my husband got home. Or so I thought. That's about the time my sweet baby decided to un-swallow all of her milk, all over the carpet. Three times.

An amazing friend came to the rescue and took Karoline for me. I put Alexandra in the carrier and used the carpet cleaner on our upstairs carpets. The carpets were cleaned and the laundry was going by 7:30 a.m., no harm no foul. I even had clean carpets.

I thought for sure our "un-swallow" episode was a one time ordeal. We went to Costco. We came home covered in more un-swallowed milk. A huge thank you to the grandma who stepped in to be our grandma and grabbed tons of napkins and willingly helped us with our mess.

We headed to see our pediatrician since sweet baby had yet to have a wet diaper. A not so quick trip later we had a diagnosis that most likely pointed to a stomach bug. Alexandra was given a prescription for an anti-nausea medicine. We dropped off her prescription and I just could not bring myself to pick it up. I do not feel right about giving my baby such a strong medicine. In my opinion, if she were to need this medicine then she would need more extensive care.

So here I am, everyone is asleep. The house is only half clean. I'm going to have to completely start over. Call it OCD, call it whatever you want, it's going to have to happen. But, not tonight, and not tomorrow, we have plans. Maybe Monday. This was a day that I was forced to remember that days will not always go as I have them planned. I have to be okay with this and take the days as they come. I have to embrace and enjoy each day, because we are not promised tomorrow. I decided to scroll through Facebook before going to bed to try and unwind. I saw some happy posts, but some that broke my heart as well. I have friends who have sick family members, really sick. I have friends who have had to give their babies back to heaven. Friends who are not sure how they are going to pay for dinner at the end of the month. All of this in my little world. Outside of that little world there are unthinkable things that occur every day. There are people that pray to have my problems.

This post isn't meant to glorify my life. Perhaps a reminder, a reminder to be thankful and to give thanks. Next time try to catch yourself when start to get upset when your plans don't go as you had expected, I know I will certainly try to. My goal is to look for the diamonds in the rough. Thank you to everyone who supported us today. Your phone calls, texts, providing napkins and child care were much appreciated.

Alexandra: You're One!

Alexandra,

On the night before you turn one my mind is full of emotions and memories of where we were one year ago. We had already spent the day in the hospital. I'd walked halls relentlessly. Your dad had applied counter pressure until his hands were sore. I knew that if there was any way I was going to have the energy to have you the old fashion way I was going to need to sleep. After an epidural I was able to sleep a little. Who are we kidding, I don't even remember sleeping, why must the blood pressure cuff alarm go off every time you fall asleep? Furthermore, for the love of my veins, if you ever have another sibling I will not rest until my IV is in a location in which I can actually move my hand without excruciating pain!

Something special with the moon happened that night, far be it for me to remember what exactly, a blood moon, maybe? Morning came and my dream of the birth date of 4/14/14 for you slipped away.

Still no baby, but my doctor was present and we felt much more at ease about a repeat c-section.

8:52 a.m.: Your dad told me, "It's a ...a, GIRL!" You were a beautiful baby girl, 7 pounds, 15 oz and 19.5 inches long. I asked your dad if your name fit, he said it did. There you were, Alexandra Elizabeth Reed.

You were a calm baby, just like my pregnancy. You were and are beautiful. I was so happy to enjoy every moment of loving you.

Here we are, one year later. When I think about everything that we've done in the past year I am amazed. You taught me not to second guess my instincts. We survived food allergies, together. You were a driving force for our family to eat much more healthy than we already were. You gave us structure. You taught us patience. You slept by me, on me and in a carrier. You smiled whenever anyone smiled at you. My heart beams with joy as I watch you learn how to walk, play and be an adorable little person. I'm sorry that I'm not as sentimental as some and that you may not always have had on the cutest outfits or bows. There are so many creative things I had wanted to do that went out the window when life happened. You won't have a cute "smash" cake at your birthday party. However, you will always have my love, all of it. I am thankful and honored that I get to be your mom. I will strive to be the best one that I can be, for you. You are, and always will be, one of my most precious treasures.

I hope and pray that you are happy all the days of your life my little joy, my Alexandra Elizabeth. 

Love, 

Mom

A little first birthday photoshoot fun! 

I love you my sweet girl!

To the FDA

If I were to write a letter to the Food and Drug Administration it would look something like this...

The morning started out like any other. My two little girls were up, dressed and fed. We were in the time frame where there's not a lot I can get done before one of the girls needs me. I had turned to my computer to see what was going on in the world outside of our home. That was when I found this article about one mom's terrifying experience with food dyes effecting her daughter in a horrible way. I felt like my world (diet wise) was closing in on me. For the past six months I've been making a conscious effort to make healthy choices for my family. Somehow I had forgotten that there are food dyes to look out for. Feeling already sick to my stomach with this discovery I remembered something a friend had once said about, "caramel color." She had said, "It is a known carcinogen." At the time I don't think I had thought much of it and to be completely honest I didn't even know what a carcinogen was. Reading about the food dyes had it back on my mind.

car-cin-o-gen: noun, a substance capable of causing cancer in living tissue.

There it is. Let me disclose, I'm not a doctor. I have no qualifications as a dietician or nutritionist. I'm not sure how you read that definition, but I took it as, should NOT be consumed by living tissue, a.k.a, humans.

I ransacked the refrigerator. Soy sauce, mind you we had the wheat free kind to accommodate my youngest daughters food allergies, CARAMEL COLOR. Trash. BBQ sauce: CARAMEL COLOR. Trash. I turned to our pantry next. I'm thankful that I didn't find too many items with dyes or caramel color. However, there was one that really upset me. Oatmeal: CARAMEL COLOR. Why?! Why does oatmeal need to be a different color? Why can't it be the color that it is naturally This is the oatmeal that I was eating daily while pregnant, the oatmeal I feed my 2 year old. I was thankful that the gluten free oatmeal that Alexandra and I have been eating as of late does not contain the color.

I moved on to the bathroom in search of labels that contained caramel color or food dyes. Toothpaste: blue dye. I turned to the medicine cabinet, some of the medicines we had contained red or blue dyes. I picked up my prenatal vitamins and looked at the ingredients. Yellow, blue and red dye, all present. All in the vitamin that I have been taking daily for the last five years. The vitamin that I made sure I took, even if all else failed nutritionally, while I was pregnant. I'm mad. Why does my vitamin, something that is supposed to be a healthy choice, contain this?

I'm thankful that food dyes, in excessive amounts, are consumed with rarity in our home. Thanks to this new discovery I'm hoping to eliminate them and caramel color completely from our diets. But this doesn't answer my questions, why do they exist?

There are laws in our country keeping us safe (for example: wear your seatbelt). Why is the FDA not keeping our food safe? I know that we all have a choice in what we eat. As a busy mom I would hope that I could grab a box of, what is commonly perceived as "healthy," oatmeal and feed it to my children without worrying about hidden poison. Hidden poison that's everywhere. There are high levels of arsenic in rice. Chicken is being injected with steroids. Gluten is not necessary but yet it contaminates so many foods.

How do you combat all of this, and that's not even the half of it? Organic options are expensive. I am thankful to have the luxury to purchase the organic food our family has recently converted to. But, to be completely honest, I hate spending extra money. I hate that going out and about means that I have to bring all of our food with us. Finding organic options when eating out are few and far between. And even though organic options exist we still are leaving our food, a basic necessity of life, in the hands of someone else. At this point if moving to Alaska and living on a homestead to provide our own meats and produce were an option I would strongly consider it.

I felt like I was being a bit drastic as I made all these realization and trips to my trash can to discard foods containing dyes and caramel color. I decided to look and see what I could find as far as what foods we have in our country that are not sold in other countries. I found a list of 10 foods that are typically banned from other countries. Please look at number five as it relates directly to this specific topic.  According to this article I found on FoxNews, "Not all coloring agents are harmful, but some, including blue #1, and 2, yellow #5 and 6, and red #40, have raised specific health concerns, after research showed they can cause behavioral problems, cancer, birth defects, and other health problems in laboratory animals," (The Daily Meal, All Things Food and Drink). Remember the prenatal vitamins I mentioned? They contain yellow #6, red #40 and blue #1. Fabulous. I told all of this to my husband and he said, "It's like it's a conspiracy." For me, a light bulb had just been turned on. It really is like a conspiracy. If you can't afford organic produce or you simply don't know what a carcinogen is (me), then you continue to consume these things daily.

In writing this I have no intention to make any other person feel badly about not eliminating these things from their pantry or diet. Six months ago I wouldn't have even given this a second thought. But, here I am, wondering how am I supposed to fix this problem for my family? My family of two little girls and a husband who, genetically, need to not be eating anything that can pollute their bodies. I am in the process of finding alternatives. As I thought I was about done with this post I was looking at the box of rice cereal I was giving my daughters as finger food. The key ingredient to the one dessert I've been able to eat with all of our food allergies. Three letters stood out to me on the ingredients list, BTA. I snatched up the computer and referred back to the list of ten foods typically not allowed in other countries. Sure enough, there it was, number ten on the list. My sweet baby girls, I've been feeding them poison, everything I've been giving them has something in it that they shouldn't be having.

I was able to go to the grocery store by myself yesterday and take my time reading labels. I found a few organic cereals that did not contain BTA or BHA. My goal is to not purchase any of the ten foods on that list for my family. But, what happens when my kids go to school and their school lunch contains these things? Or they go to a birthday party and eat a cupcake with colored frosting? I am very well versed in the saying, "Everything in moderation." But, no. Just NO. In the past I used this saying as a crutch for making me feel better when I fell short in preparing healthy meals. A little bit of poison is still poison.

Food and drug administration, I'm mad. I'm mad because despite my best efforts, I'm still human. Hot dogs, food dyes and caramel color still make it to my family. My goal is to eliminate all of these things and not purchase them. But, they are easy and they are EVERYWHERE. What do I do when my children see candy at the store or need a snack when we are away from home? We live in an amazing country where we have freedom of choice. I am having the hardest time wrapping my mind around the concept that these food choices are even available. There has to be another way, doesn't there? There must be, some healthy options do exist. I applaud the companies that are doing what's right and using natural ingredients, the ones that aren't modifying foods at all. I hope one day that all companies follow in their footsteps. In the mean time, I encourage each and every one of my family members and friends who have stuck out yet another one of my, "bad food posts," to reassess. This month I plan to read every label before I purchase anything. If there's something I'm not sure about I will look it up. If there's something I can't pronounce, I won't buy it. My ultimate goal is to try 30 days of no processed foods. We as a family are getting there, slowly. With summer around the corner I feel like eating "real food," is going to be a bit easier to jump start. I know this won't always be an option but I hope and pray that for us it will soon be our new normal. For now we will stick to food that has no dyes, no artificial color, no caramel color, no preservatives (this one of the hardest to avoid for us as it seems to be in so many meats) and is made of all ingredients we can pronounce. We have a choice. We can keep our bodies fueled with real food if we make it a priority.

Sincerely,

A mom who is trying.



For my friends and family: I wanted to share a list with you of foods that had caramel color, dyes, or preservatives that were in our house that I was surprised by. I will list the food and options I've found that don't have them.

Quaker Oatmeal instant packets (caramel color)  --->Chex gluten-free does not!
Soy Sauce (so many have caramel color) --->Gluten free section you can find one without wheat or caramel color
BBQ Sauce (too many to list have caramel color) --->Stubbs Brand does not have it
Yogurt-certain flavored brands (caramel color) --->Organic yogurt
Honey Bunches of Oats (caramel color) --->Organic cereals
Rice Crisipies (BTA) --->Organic cereals
Pretzels (caramel color and preservatives) --->Organic pretzels
Ginger Ale (caramel color) ---> Sparkling water with cranberry juice (this was one of my favorites growing up)
Hand soaps/body wash/shampoo/toothpaste --->Young Living Essential Oil alternatives

1.